Boiling water

I try to type something.

But in the end of every single letter I wish to type.

Ended with a soft humming sound inside.

Alhamdulillah 'ala kulli hal. 

I'm not pretty sure whether its a hadeeth or verse from al-Quran. It says somehow like, if you got a blessing, tell people so that people will be grateful.

I may not telling you in a good way, the most wisdom way. 

Yet.
I cried counting my blessings. heh. I'm not a cengeng type to be honest. Yet... that's it. Allah, You're so merciful. Up till Your Mercies left me to silent.

 Unos:

A man cannot have the love of Music and the love of the Qur’an, in the same heart. Only one can be present. One must enter, and the other must leave. ~Ibn Taimiyah

Stab wound inside. A deep stab wound.

I dont know the kind of music during Ibn Taimiyah era. I dont know the reasons behind his wisdom. Why he uttered that sentence. 

Yet. Despite everything, I believe he talked from experience and knowledge he had. And somehow inside, while the wound bleed, I admit he is right. 

Dont tell people to do this and that but you dont practice your own words. I'm really afraid of the verse in Surah as-Saff. But fact is fact. Truth is truth no matter what depth the wound cause.

Gradually. I mean for me. Go easy, gradually. Take a baby step, then take the toodler pace, until you reach the athlete marathon run. I did change my kind of music 180 degrees from before. I mean, during the era of total jahiliyyah of mine and now the era of constant fighting.  At least. I tried. And looking back. At least, it does differ.

To leave music is somehow somewhat... ripping the inner self? Heh. I dont know the exact words. Because I do dream to involve myself in this area. Of course not the singing one. Heh. Katak pun takut nak dengar kot. 

At least... I want to jump in this area either in instrumentations or the melody or the lyrical part. Too ambitious. ahah. Masalah betul manusia ni. Tak pernah puas.

Dos: 

Talking about al-Quran. There's no such melody in this world can be compared to the melodious rhythm of its beautiful words. No matter who, no matter what kind of voice the reciter has, no matter what. Its simply beautiful. Soothing. I do this when I feel some part of me is missing. And the magic is... even after listening to few verses, the verses will humming in my head. Especially the verses that touch the right spot inside. And then, automatically I feel content. :D

Love letters. No other perfect balm. I think thats what Ibn Taimiyah meant also by his words.

Tres: 

Whats the matter I'm talking about music. Heh. The below pic. The chinese calligraphy said 'Sami Yusuf'. Ahah. I'm sorry. ;) I just... told ya right. Music is somewhat my passion.

Give me good beat, good bass, good drums, good instrumentations, good harmony, good rhythm, good lyrics. Heh. The matter of being high taste in music. I have to, right. ;) 

What you listened to will affect your heart. Be choosy. Nobody wants to ruin their own hearts. Or else your relationship with Allah will be affected. This is the reason why I have to be choosy in musics. 

So to have a good heart, have good things touch your ears. :D

May Allah bless.
Do pray for me. I still have a lot to be read. :(

But... like the title said, boiling water inside. ahah.
Okay. Back to books. ;)